Empowered, A Tribute

So, after seven long, grueling, tedious, tear filled months....

...*drumroll*

It's over.

I am over it.

I am over HIM.

I am over the drama, the cheating, and the lies.

Because I am better than that.

I made up with an old friend. I wouldn't say we're friends again, but we are once more on good terms. We've been buddies since the 3rd grade. We went to D.C. together, and BOA. (Bands of America, do not judge me). We've been with eachother through thick and thin. Through complete annoyance, bratty guard girls, dating eachother's crushes, and idiots who like to spread rumors. After a long, tedious guard season, we had our fights, and we had our wonderful moments.




"I wouldn't want to go through any of this bullcrap with anyone but you."

That's one of my favorite pictures in the world, by the way.

I was a tad bit ridiculous and overreacted about something she had said to me, and just stopped talking to her. It wasn't an uncommon reaction at that time in my life.

I opened up to her about what my life had been like for the past several months. and she sent me a quote:

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
- Jeremiah 29:11

Not one for many Bible verses, but this one, spoke volumes to me. That small section meant worlds to me. And the fact that she knew exactly what to tell me blows me away. I hope that we become close again. She's fun, and a great person to have around. We are ridiculous and goofy together. For instance, there are very few pictures of us with a straight face.


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Next, my cousin Holly. I went back and read something she sent to me last September, that actually made me cry.

She told me how much she loved me. And how, she hopes, that one day, her three little girls would grow up to be just like me. She told me that any guy that had my heart was the luckiest man in the world.

Never has a simple little message meant so much to me. Going back and reading it, makes me realize that I am worth something. That those little cousins of mine look up to me, and I can't spend my time moping about. I need to show them that I'm strong, and can overcome anything. Because that's the kind of women I want them to grow up to be, because I love them.

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Oh Brie, what can I say about her?

Well, she has a habit of driving me -crazy-, as I'm sure she can tell you. I'm sure I drive her nuts too. Occassionally, we find eachother's problems trivial, and really don't care to give advise on the subject matter anymore. But we're honest about that.

"You're being a little ridiculous about this, don't you think? Is it really that big of a deal?"

Which, at the end of the day, is like a wake up call.

But we're honest about our advise too.

Brie would never tell me that everything is going to be okay if it's not. She knows I don't want to hear a lie. She'll tell me if she thinks I'm dating a dirt bag or a friend is treating me like old defecation. I do the same for her. We are not optimistic, nor pessimistic. We are real with eachother. And that's what she's been throughout this ordeal. We have our problems. We fight. Usually twice a year, once in the fall, and once in the spring without fail. I kid you not. It happens every single year. In fact, I get nervous when it hasn't happened yet. And even if we say "I'm never talking to that crazy bitch again," in a week, someone will call and said fight will be over. No apologies are usually thrown out. It's more like, "You're a bitch. But, I wouldn't have you any other way. How's life?"




Before college, marriage, and babies, we were just a couple goons graduating from high school with some tall dreams, but never wanting the present to end.


We've endured a lot through our friendship, and I'm glad to know that despite the 6,000 miles, she's still only a phone call away.
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So, what would my life be like without Katie and Julie?

Not too funny.

I had never laughed so much in my life as I did my freshman year of college.

Those two girls had done some of the nicest things for me that anyone has ever done, starting with the German Carnival that flooded my room for my 18th birthday. They've always stood up for me and been by my side. Though we haven't been as close lately, I guess that's my fault. They are truly two awesome, caring girls. I wouldn't have spent my days and my dinners with anyone else.

Oh, and someone is always laughing:



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And last, but not least, is Miss Amanda Sha-Ray Bannister.


This girl is my rock. It's hard for me to find words to express all this. And I can feel the tears flowing as I try to find the right words.

I feel like I've been a lousy best friend.

She's been there for me and done more for me than any other single person on this planet. (Besides my parental units of course. I'm pretty sure she didn't give birth to me or feed/clothe/love me for the 18 years in which I didn't know her.)

The way she has turned out is a miracle. She is the most caring, loving, and nuturing person I know. And she didn't have that kind of childhood.

She makes me realize how much I take for granted.

Yet, this year, I haven't done too much for her.

I would say that it'd be because I wasn't able to do anything for myself, and as true as that is, it doesn't matter.

But, she has stuck by me.

She has stuck by me through all my good and bad decisions, never once saying "I told you so." She hugged me when I cried, and always knew what to say or do to make me feel better.

I'm sorry that I had to put her through watching me be miserable day after day. Because if she were that way, I wouldn't be able to take it.

She was realistic. She knew she couldn't make me better, but dammit, she did everything she could.

And for that, I am forever thankful.

I have never had a best -best- friend. All of my friends had at least one more friend, male or female, who was just a little closer. It always upset me that I hadn't found anyone like that.

But...just as that Bible verse said, God had plans.

True, He made me wait for 18 years to find that friend...

But He gave me the best one anyone could ever ask for.







These are people who empower me. They do not put me down or try to belittle me, or cover my voice. They are people that are worth having in my life. I am so blessed to have met these wonderful people, and though I've had misfortunes, God has given me the most wonderful friends anyone could ever ask for.

The Price of Beauty

So, at the beginning of this month, Sassysharay and I were at Crocker Park in Westlake.

Crap went down, and I fought with someone I really cared about. And talked to him for the last time.

Was kinda torn up about it. No lies.

So, she suggested we go get our nails done. I said sure; I had never gotten my nails done before, and I figured that it would soothe me a little.

I'm never getting fake nails again.

First of all, the lady who did my nails (Although she did a -fantastic- job) was not a very nice lady. She made no pleasant conversation with me, and all she really did was complain about how skinny my nail beds are. First of all, I'm paying you $35 for this; you could at least be pleasant with me. Secondly, if you don't like my nail beds, don't do my nails.

She busted three of my cuticles. Three. They bled, and it hurt like hell. Did I get an apology? Nope.

I will say that my nails lasted almost a full month.

I tried to take them off today.

I got my thumb nail and half my pointer finger. When my thumbnail came off, a slew of cursewords were released from my mouth that no respectable person would say in front of their mother. I'd have rather vomited or sliced my hand open. It hurt -that- bad.

Needless to say, I'm not touching them again until I get my hands on some pure acetone. Nail polish remover with acetone does not cut it. As soon as it dries, your nails are back to what they were before. So no matter how long you soak them, it just makes it easier for you to lift it up. Which of course, damages your nails even more than they are already.

So, when my anger subsided, I thought about how much pain women go through to look good.

I don't do much, but I never have been one to care too much. But seriously. Ever get your eyebrows waxed? That hurts like no other until you get used to it. Even after, you still kinda squeel. Nair? i tried that once and it burned. I had chemical burns on my skin. Couldn't wear pants. Remember prom updos? Once I pulled 203 bobby pins out of my hair. Just to name a few things.

We women should really get more credit for what we go through to look nice for our men. The least they could do is put on a button up shirt, eh?

Music Monday! Beatles vs. Beach Boys

So, I thought that I'd start off Music Mondays with the most epic of epic music battles.

Who is better: Beatles? or the Beach Boys?

I remember this being the biggest battle ever in elementary school, and even middle school.

The class stood divided. Most girls always chose the Beach Boys simply because one of the most popular boys in school (who was gorgeous of course) always sided with them.

I firmly held my ground that the Beatles are the shizzz.

And, because I am lazy, I am going to support this via Wikipedia.

Here's a list of awards the Beatles have received:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_awards_and_nominations_received_by_The_Beatles

Wikipedia doesn't have a list for the Beach Boys.

Beatles:
"In 1965, Queen Elizabeth II appointed the four Beatles Members of the Order of the British Empire (MBE).[95] The Beatles film Let It Be (1970) won the 1971 Academy Award for Best Original Song Score.[188] The Beatles have received 7 Grammy Awards[5] and 15 Ivor Novello Awards.[6] They have been awarded 6 Diamond albums, as well as 24 Multi-Platinum albums, 39 Platinum albums and 45 Gold albums in the United States,[196][268] while in the UK they have 4 Multi-Platinum albums, 4 Platinum albums, 8 Gold albums and 1 Silver album.[197] The group were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1988. In 2008, Billboard magazine released a list of the all-time top-selling Hot 100 artists to celebrate the US singles chart's fiftieth anniversary—The Beatles ranked number one.[4] In 2009, the Recording Industry Association of America certified that The Beatles have sold more albums in the US than any other artist.[3] The Beatles have had more number one albums, 15, on the UK charts and held down the top spot longer, 174 weeks, than any other musical act.[2] The Beatles were collectively included in Time magazine's compilation of the 20th century's 100 most influential people.[7]"


Beach Boys:
"The group was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1988,[50] with Mike Love delivering a speech that assailed Mick Jagger, Paul McCartney and the Beatles, Bruce Springsteen, Billy Joel and Diana Ross.[51] The band was chosen for the Vocal Group Hall of Fame in 1998.[52] In 2001, the group received the Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award. Brian Wilson was inducted into the UK Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in November 2006.[53] In 2004, Rolling Stone Magazine ranked the Beach Boys #12 on their list of the 100 Greatest Artists of All Time, .[54]

In 2007, the Beach Boys were inducted into the Hit Parade Hall of Fame.[52]

The group is frequently referred to when the topic of summertime songs comes up. About.com listed Sounds of Summer: The Very Best of The Beach Boys, a 2003 compilation CD, as the greatest summertime hits CD.[55]

Richard Daniel Roman's Latin pop summer classic "Vive El Verano" is dedicated to the Beach Boys.



The Wilsons' Hawthorne, California house, where the Wilson brothers grew up and the group began, was demolished in 1986 to make way for Interstate 105, the Century Freeway. A Beach Boys Historic Landmark (California Landmark #1041 at 3701 West 119th Street), dedicated on May 20, 2005, marks the location. The Beach Boys continue to tour, with a backing band accompanying original members Mike Love and Bruce Johnston. Other "honorary Beach Boys", such as John Stamos and former member David Marks also make guest appearances on their tours.[56]

As of 2010[update], the remaining Beach Boys (Love and Johnston, minus Brian and Jardine) continue to tour.[57]

The Beach Boys logo was created by artist Jim Evans, and was originally used on the "15 Big Ones" record sleeve."



Mmmmmhmm.


The Beatles are so good that the King of Pop himself bought their catalouge in 1985 for $47 million. (That goes to show how much money Thriller made...woot. Don't worry, I'll be doing a special one of these for my favorite MJ. Don't hate.)

Not to mention, just think about it. How many Beatles songs are still popular today? A lot. How many Beach Boys? To be honest, I know Surfin in the USA. Good song. And I'm not dissing on the Beach Boys; they are obviously accomplished.

I'm just saying that I think the Beatles are better :]




What do you think?

L.O.V.E.?

First of all, I am sorry that I haven't updated. It's been a very hectic week getting settled into my temporary home.

Let me say that I love this place. There is nothing here; granted, but it's exactly what I've needed. Time away is the best way to heal a broken heart, I suppose. I'm at a point where my heart doesn't belong to anyone else, but it doesn't quite belong to myself either.

Hey, it's better than I had been.

And yes, I'm aware that I am still, unfortunately, damaged goods.

I have not had the best of luck with the 'l' word. I am too trusting, too forgiving, and far too honest with my emotions when it comes to my relationships. It's important to be all of these things, but, in overdoses, it can make one vunerable, and therefore, an easy target.

Paint a bullseye on my head, thank you.

So, I usually end up falling head over heels, which results in one majorly broken heart.

I've always been romanticizing, thinking that my Prince Charming will come sweep me off my feet. I watched the Little Mermaid and Aladdin everday. What did you expect from me? Disney gives you unrealistic expectations about love and hair, I can tell you that.

But now, I have this invisible, indestructable 7ft tall retaining wall around me that's not coming down for -anyone-. I now trust most guys as far as I can throw them, which, is not very far.

I'm starting to loosen up though...but not by my own experiences. I'm letting down my guard watching the people I love.

-My best friend has an incredible relationship with her boyfriend. They are two people I never would have stuck together if I had known them separately. But they work together. They would do anything for eachother, as was proved this month. They fight over some ridiculous things, but they always look at eachother with those goo goo eyes. She'll blush when she reads this, but I have no doubt that those two will last forever. They've already been through so much thick and thin.

-My cousin met her husband online. And not even through a dating service. She was on AIM and looked up people with the common interest 'rock music.' She picked one at random. It was only meant to be a one time conversation, but she ended up marrying him. And dig this, he's 12 years older than her. Hearing it, you'd think they'd be doomed, right? Wrong. I have never seen two people more meant for eachother in my life. I think God made them specifically for eachother. Sure, their marriage probably isn't without it's conflicts, who's is? But I look at them and see two people who are madly in love with eachother.

And lastly, my parental units. You know, they actually had no interest in eachother to begin with. In fact, my father never failed to annoy my mother. But, they've been married almost 25 years, and they're still going strong. I've seen them go through the thick and thin, and they always come out stronger. And I still catch them giving eachother goo-goo eyes, and not at special occasions. No, I see them look at eachother like that simply at the dinner table, or watching television in the evening. It's the best. And I only hope I can find half the love that they have for eachother.

My retaining wall? Down to about 6.5'.

Do you have any inspiring love stories to share?

When you get some feedback...♪

Hey everyone! I finally got a break so I'm gonna do a little blogging.

Tennessee is awesome. I will admit, I'm living in the middle of nowhere. But, I've got my family, and that's great. I worked awhile at the course today, and I think I'm going to just fine. It is going to be an amazing summer.

So, I'm starting this new thing on Mondays...Music Mondays. (Calling it that because I'm not too terribly creative with names.) So, basically, I'm going to pick a genre, artist, or even a specific song each Monday and blog about it. And The Wifey made me a spiffy little button for it, if you guys would care to participate. (She's my irl bff, you know.) It's on the right hand side of this site.

Also, if you'd like to follow me on twitter --> http://twitter.com/stanleycakes

I don't know what direction I would like to take with this blog. I think memes are really awesome, but it's not really -my- blog if I'm constantly doing other people's memes, right? So, dear followers, I would like to know the kind of stuff you'd like to hear from me. You guys are quite awesome, I won't lie. And I'd like to get a big following going, so some feedback would totally be appreciated.

If you're an art junkie, feel free also to check out my deviantart website. http://mandypants90.deviantart.com

Well, that's really all the time I have for right now. I'll have to come up with something for the Weekend Irk. Even though I'm in far too good of a mood to be irritated :]

WOO!

I have 12 followers now. I'm actually pretty pumped. Baha.

Sorry for the lack of bloggage, but I'm gonna be leaving for Tennessee in the morning, and once I'm there, I'll have lots of free time, so expect me to get way into it. :]

Love you all!

The Weekend Irk: Arethra!

So, I had prof my freshman year, who, instead of yelling at someone for not paying attention or talking over her in class just would shout "Arethra!"

You know, like R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Little things bother me, I won't lie about that.

So last week, I went to go brush my teeth. My friend Sha-Ray was brushing hers as well. We were just goofin off when she goes to grab her mouth wash. She just stares at it for a minute, then lets out a "WTF?!". Her mouth wash is purple. There was blue mouthwash in the bottle. Gross.

So, then, a day or two later, I go to get a shower, and I notice that I can't find my facewash. So, I turn off the shower and look around. My facewash, along with Sha-Ray's shampoo and conditioner (for blonde hair) and someone else's body wash was in one of the shower caddys. Needless to say, we both threw a fit at our RA and kept our shower stuff in our own rooms for the rest of the semester.

I know that occassionally you run out of stuff in college. If someone wanted to use my face wash, all they had to do was knock on my door and ask. I would say "Sure, just make sure you put it back when you're done." Simple, right? I'm not a hog, I will share nearly anything, but you can't just take it and figure I'll be okay with it. Not cool.

Sunday morning, I woke up around 5am because I had to pee like a banshee. I walk back to my room to see "WHORE!" written in big pink letters on my marker board. I may have cried about it. That's a hurtful word, and it shouldn't be thrown around like that, even if it's true. Now, do I believe I'm the dirty W? No. I don't. (I think I'm a nice lady. Bahaa. Hangover joke.) And no one that matters to me thinks I'm that, so in the end, I'm able to not let myself be beat up about it. But, still, that's a nasty thing to do, joke or not. Not to mention, it's very...high school *shudders*.

Also last week, someone told me to "go die." Now, really? Instead of talking out the problem, and maybe realizing you were misinterpretting the whole situation, you're going to tell me to go die? Niiiice. I did cry about that one, I won't lie. It hurts to think that someone wants you -dead-. In hindsight, if i were a bitch, I would have saved the message on my phone and gotten this person in some serious doo doo. I've been pretty angry at points in my life, and the worst thing I've ever said is "I hope you have to spend your life playing the drumset in Cats the musical!" I don't understand why people have to be so...mean! Not only is telling someone to "go die" completely and totally disrespectful, it's just downright mean and nasty. How would you feel after that if something happened to that person? Not too good I bet. Now, I will point out that the situation this person is in, she has a warrant to hate me, but only because she doesn't know the truth of the situation she's in. Truth be told, I have nothing to do with the situation anymore. It does not involve me. So, I appreciate being left out of it. K thanks.

Now, I am going to continue to unpack.

Have a nice day!