L.O.V.E.?

First of all, I am sorry that I haven't updated. It's been a very hectic week getting settled into my temporary home.

Let me say that I love this place. There is nothing here; granted, but it's exactly what I've needed. Time away is the best way to heal a broken heart, I suppose. I'm at a point where my heart doesn't belong to anyone else, but it doesn't quite belong to myself either.

Hey, it's better than I had been.

And yes, I'm aware that I am still, unfortunately, damaged goods.

I have not had the best of luck with the 'l' word. I am too trusting, too forgiving, and far too honest with my emotions when it comes to my relationships. It's important to be all of these things, but, in overdoses, it can make one vunerable, and therefore, an easy target.

Paint a bullseye on my head, thank you.

So, I usually end up falling head over heels, which results in one majorly broken heart.

I've always been romanticizing, thinking that my Prince Charming will come sweep me off my feet. I watched the Little Mermaid and Aladdin everday. What did you expect from me? Disney gives you unrealistic expectations about love and hair, I can tell you that.

But now, I have this invisible, indestructable 7ft tall retaining wall around me that's not coming down for -anyone-. I now trust most guys as far as I can throw them, which, is not very far.

I'm starting to loosen up though...but not by my own experiences. I'm letting down my guard watching the people I love.

-My best friend has an incredible relationship with her boyfriend. They are two people I never would have stuck together if I had known them separately. But they work together. They would do anything for eachother, as was proved this month. They fight over some ridiculous things, but they always look at eachother with those goo goo eyes. She'll blush when she reads this, but I have no doubt that those two will last forever. They've already been through so much thick and thin.

-My cousin met her husband online. And not even through a dating service. She was on AIM and looked up people with the common interest 'rock music.' She picked one at random. It was only meant to be a one time conversation, but she ended up marrying him. And dig this, he's 12 years older than her. Hearing it, you'd think they'd be doomed, right? Wrong. I have never seen two people more meant for eachother in my life. I think God made them specifically for eachother. Sure, their marriage probably isn't without it's conflicts, who's is? But I look at them and see two people who are madly in love with eachother.

And lastly, my parental units. You know, they actually had no interest in eachother to begin with. In fact, my father never failed to annoy my mother. But, they've been married almost 25 years, and they're still going strong. I've seen them go through the thick and thin, and they always come out stronger. And I still catch them giving eachother goo-goo eyes, and not at special occasions. No, I see them look at eachother like that simply at the dinner table, or watching television in the evening. It's the best. And I only hope I can find half the love that they have for eachother.

My retaining wall? Down to about 6.5'.

Do you have any inspiring love stories to share?